Acoustic Kitty

The CIA wired a live cat as a listening device. Twenty million dollars; the cat had other plans. Declassified.

Acoustic Kitty (1960s, released 2001 in Science and Technology directorate histories): the CIA wired a cat with an implanted microphone and antenna for embassy eavesdropping; the first field test failed (the standard 'hit by a taxi' account comes from Victor Marchetti; a former officer disputes the death), and the program was abandoned as impractical — the released memo praises the team's 'energy and imagination.' The node earns its place as the confirmed absurdity calibration: the agency really did try this, which recalibrates 'they would never.'